Elves prize, above all things, uniformity and conformity, thus, it should come as no surprise that their foods are invariably made in large factories, tested, re-tested, and magically-vacuum sealed in individual wrappers to ensure perfectly consistent serving sizes, nutritional content, and freshness.

Unsurprisingly, Elven bread is among the most bland and unimaginative food you will ever eat, but at least you know what you’re getting… Every. Single. Time.

A single loaf of Elven Bread has enough calories and nutrition to feed a single elf for a day. It would take about 20 such loaves would feed a human, halfling, or other reasonable creature, and they would still suffer from gross malnourishment…